15+ Romantic Gift Fails for Story Starters

Romances often begin with characters in relationships with the wrong people. A romantic gift fail could be a lightbulb moment–this isn’t my soulmate!–and bad gifts create fun story starters.

Strange Statue — Bizarre statues… not a good romantic gift

Valentine’s Day got my writer-brain thinking about fun story starters and romantic gifts that go wrong. Whether it’s V-day, Christmas, a birthday, an anniversary, or whatever, these are gifts that maybe shouldn’t be given—unless specifically asked for, of course. I wonder what’s worse–a bad romantic gift or forgetting to get one at all.

In fiction, a romantic gift fail could drive the plot forward in a telling and amusing way—it’d say to the audience, hey, this guy, gal, or robot isn’t right for the main character.

The recipient’s reaction to a bad gift will also reveal much about her character. Is she gracious, accepting the gift with a weak smile? Or angry, dousing it with lighter fluid and setting it ablaze? Perhaps she’s only slightly disappointed–she’s used to this? Does she reveal her dissatisfaction or keep it to herself?

Here are some not-so-great, unasked-for gift ideas to use as romantic story starters:

A treadmill—a gift that says, “Honey, get moving. You need the exercise.” A treadmill could be a controlling gift, too, to prevent him or her from needing to go to a gym.
A plane ticket to Washington to visit her grandmother… only she died last year, and he forgot.
Tickets to an event only he wants to go to… sports, golf tournament, music she’s not jazzed about (ha, music pun). Here are some event-fun writing prompts to try, too.
A kitchen aid mixer, unless, of course, your significant other is into baking. Otherwise, it’s a not-so-gentle shove into the kitchen
A cookbook, another shove into the kitchen, again, unless they enjoy it. It could also be a statement about his or her cooking
Wrinkle creams or Botox. Does this need an explanation?
A creepy statue (see above) or weird artwork she doesn’t want to display. Or worse, homemade artwork created by the giver that just looks… bad. Like a nude painting that she’s expected to hang over her fireplace.
Hair regrowth treatments, gift certificates to wig or hat stores, anything that says, “I insist you do something about this.”
Subscription to Jennie Craig or Nutrisystem or the like. Nothing says love like telling your mate to go on a diet!
Recycled jewelry—this can be sweet, like a family heirloom, or creepy, like jewelry that used to belong to other girlfriends/boyfriends or bought from a pawn shop, making it a badge of a failed relationship
Spanx. I thought the days of corsets and girdles were long gone… geez.
A gym membership. A fun twist on this idea might be that she accepts the not-so-gentle nudge to get in shape and meets someone new there.
House cleaning supplies. Nudging someone to do a better job with cleaning doesn’t equal romance.
Anxiety teas, pills, gummies, etc. Unless asked for, these could send a negative message. “You’re too uptight.”
Products for excessive sweating. Any unsolicited “help” for a personal problems edges a line into insulting.
Awkward self-help books. There’s such a diversity of self-help books out there, from how to deal with gut bloat to neediness. Buying one for a significant other could say that this is a problem for them.
Anti-snoring products. Clearly, this product would be more for the giver than the receiver.
A framed picture of the gift giver–without you; kind of cocky, right?
The same gift over and over again showing a minimal amount of thought, effort, creativity. Like always buying her red roses. Always getting him a car washing kit.
Really, anything that says to the person, you need to change